30+ Best Funny Sleep Quotes & Memes When You Can't Sleep (2025)

Sleep is a fabulous thing. There are some nights when we just can’t sleep. We’ve compiled a list of can’t sleep quotes that make you relax at night. From inspiring thought leaders like Mahatma Gandhi to iconic artists like Leonardo Da Vinci, enjoy these funny sleep quotes and have a nice dream in the night. It’s a time where our body relaxes and our mind can dream. Here are some of our favorite funny sleep quotes that truly capture the beauty of sleep.

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What are some night quotes?

  • People who say they sleep like a baby usually don’t have one. — Leo J. Burke
  • My mother told me to follow my dreams, so I took a nap. — Unknown
  • Why fall in love when you can fall asleep? — Unknown
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  • I’m so good at sleeping. I can do it with eyes closed.
  • You won’t feel sleepy at work, if you sleep at work.
  • I love sleep because it’s like a time machine to breakfast.
  • I have two moods: Sleep is for the weak. I need to sleep for a week.
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Can’t Sleep Quotes

  • Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone. — Anthony Burgess
  • They call it the American Dream because you have to be asleep to believe it. — George Carlin
  • Me risking my joy, career, and future to get extra 15 minutes of sleep. — Unknown
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  • Dear mind, please stop thinking so much at night. I need to sleep.
  • I feel like I’m already tired tomorrow.
  • I don’t want to sleep like a baby. I want to sleep like my husband.
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  • Happiness is waking up, looking at the clock and finding that you still have two hours left to sleep. — Charles M. Schulz
  • Some people talk in their sleep. Lecturers talk while other people sleep. — Albert Camus
  • “I’m going to bed” really means “I’m going to lie in my bed and go on my phone”. — Unknown
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Sleeping Quotes Funny for Instagram

  • Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labor. — John Ciardi
  • If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late. — Henry Youngman
  • Those who snore always fall asleep first. — Unknown
  • I’m trying to read a book on how to relax, but I keep falling asleep. — Jim Loy
  • The most dangerous game to play: “Resting your eyes in the morning after shutting off your alarm.” — Unknown
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Funny sleep quotes for Facebook

  • I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I’d be a college graduate today. — George Foreman
  • Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world. But they are also terrorists. You’ll realize this as soon as they are born and they start using sleep deprivation to break you. — Ray Romano
  • We used to sleep five to a bed and three of them used to wet the bed. I learnt to swim before I could walk. — Bernard Manning
  • Waking up in the middle of the night and realizing you still have time to sleep. — Unknown
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Sleepless night quotes funny

  • I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I’m awake, you know? — Ernest Hemingway
  • Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong. — George Carlin
  • Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. — Dave Barry
  • The amount of sleep required by the average person is five minutes more. — Wilson Mizener
  • No civilized person goes to bed the same day he gets up.— Richard HardingDavis
  • The lion and the calf shall lie down together, but the calf won’t get much sleep. — Woody Allen
  • When your alarm goes off in the morning and you think to yourself, “do I really need an education?” — Unknown
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Here’s my roundup of the funniest can’t sleep quotes and sayings only those of us who have lain awake at 3 a.m. can understand. So go ahead and enjoy funny sleep quotes, let the melatonin flow through your brain!

If you have trouble sleeping, tryShutEye, an all in one sleep app. ShutEye brings a wide variety of tools to help you fall asleep and understand your sleep cycles from a scientific perspective.

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30+ Best Funny Sleep Quotes & Memes When You Can't Sleep (2025)
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